I just want to be a kid...

I am at the point in my life where I know I cannot afford to continue acting like a child. I have responsibilities to hold myself to. I am really expected to do something with me life. I suppose when considering my age I am already an adult but I feel as though becoming an adult will officially start when I graduate with a degree. Then my life will be about finding a job and being able to support myself- without the aid of my family and or parent.s

I think this upcoming entrance into adulthood should scare me but for some reason, I feel like it is perfectly natural. I do not feel worried about having to make ends meet and focus on my life finanically. I do not feel nervous about pledging my love to Mike for the rest of my life. Overall, I just feel as though the rest of my life (and how it turns out) is just a long time coming.

Ideally, my life would be completely planned out. At least with regards to the big things like my career, having a home and a family, etc. I want to finish school. Find a job. Save up enough money to move in with Mike and then of course get married. Then before I turn 30 I hope to have my first child and then continue working. Hopefully somewhere not too far down the line, I would like to have a second child or even adopt one. Then the rest of my life will be dedicated to loving my family and living my life in the way that makes me the happiest.

Personally, I think this is plan sounds completely reasonable but I know it is not realistic to believe that my life will unfold according to this plan. In fact, I know that there will be major challeneges and one of those life goals might not even happen. But I think the main thing that is keeping me fighting for this ideal life is my faith- my hope.

Perhaps if I want it so badly, it will happen?